Tuesday, May 29, 2012

Raymond Lam - A Man's Guide to Wedding Planning (Part 2)

Love Actually...Happens

I noticed every time I interview an artist, some topics will eventually turn into an useless chat, for example traveling, shopping and marriage. The most common response I get is, "Too busy, I basically have no time" and followed by a chain of hypothetical answers. Have the right to believe, artists choose to improvise their actions and when the time is right, they will go do it. To all Fans, please relax, Raymond Lam is not married. He has no time. Basically his answer is, "It just happens!" If time comes, will he immediately get married?

J = JMEN
R = RAYMOND LAM

J : What is your dream wedding like?

R : Under the sunshine at the beach is not bad, let's do a beach wedding! Don't you think it be fun for the bride and groom to exchange wedding rings on surfboards? The wedding attire...a ’chicken wing’ sleeveless tuxedo, by that time it probably be really hot. I just want the ceremony, wedding clothing and all aspects of the wedding to be fun. My wedding won't be too traditional. Why not just say, I hope my wedding would be more like a big party or like a carnival type. It is not just between two people, there will be the bride and groom's family members sharing the happiness together. That would be a perfect type of wedding. On the wedding day, besides being an unforgettable day for my wife and myself, it will also be a memorable day for our guests.

J : Then have you been to a memorable wedding ceremony?

R : A memorable wedding, of course the family weddings. Each time I watch a family member get married, I feel very touched and also at my good friends' weddings. Come to think of it, I have only been the best man once in my lifetime. That was several years ago though. Thinking back now, I thought it was fun. Unfortunately I'm getting busier and busier with my work, even if my good friends ask me to be their groomsmen or best man, I won't be able to do it. One time, I already tried on the best man suit, but because I suddenly had to go to work, I had to turn down that friend. I truly feel sorry.

J : Good friends getting married, have you thought of when its your turn to get married?

R : When you are so busy that you don't even have the time to take a few hour break or get a good sleep, then how could you think of when to marry or when the wedding will be? To me, marriage is still too far. I always say that I definitely will be the last person to marry among my good brothers. Fortunately my sister is married and had children, so that takes my family's attention off of me. The elders in my family haven't really rushed me to marry.

J : Since you're so busy, when you do get married, will you let your fiance do all the wedding planning?

R : Yes! If even I'm not busy, I will let the girl handle and decide it all. Marriage is a very important and meaningful event in a woman's life. It is the day where every woman looks their most beautiful. That's why I am not against the woman deciding everything for the wedding. I don't mind. Actually, I am too lazy to deal with the wedding plans!

J : Do you think about marriage every time you date?

R: Yes, every time I'm in a relationship, I have more or less thought about marriage.

J : And from those thoughts, have you thought of how you would propose?

R : Ha, I haven't thought of how I would propose. It is useless even if you ask me to think about it now. I advocate for 'however it fits', especially for us artists, [we have] that kind of creative talent for improvisation. Wait until that moment when I can propose, should propose, by then everything that I say would come out right from the heart.

J : What do you think of marriage? Do you want to start a family?

R : I am strongly family-oriented and I like children. Marriage is a must, especially I am the oldest son and grandson in the family. Some people will say at what age or year they will get married, but to me, it is all about timing. So, I carry an attitude of 'let nature take its course'. I don't have any plans nor am I rushed at all. Actually, I want to stress again, marriage is not between two people, rather it is between family of both sides. Some people imagine their wedding, the location, vows, wedding attire or ceremony, are these things the most important? The most important is not merely your partner, but all of the above. As for when my partner will appear? That is also about timing. When the time comes, the love between you and your partner will have reached consensus, your family likes your partner, both sides of the family agree to the marriage. If you ask me, marriage? Leave it to fate.

J : Do you think marriage will make a man truly become a man?

R : I don't agree. Marriage does not represent that a man is mature. Unmarried men can also be very mature. In fact, I'm not married, so I don't know how to answer this question. Haha! Why not say, marriage is a stage in life, it just happens!

Some people say women in a wedding dress are especially beautiful. In fact, men in a tuxedo are also especially attractive. Raymond Fans, is that right?

Source: JMEN Magazine Issue #35 (Scans Courtesy of Phoebe @ Weibo)
Translated by: aZnangel @ AsianEU Forum

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